A need you can meet.
As I have told you, one of my many side effects of my mental health is that I get so attached. This isn’t to be confused with need attention, but merely affection and the craving to be around my support network. Sometimes when my world becomes dark I need people to numb the pain, help me understand that sometimes what I see or feel isn’t real and to talk me down from a high.
One issue I also have is the counter balance of this. I always feel like I can’t lean on people because of the fear of being a burden. This acts very harshly in line with the previous statement and makes life somewhat difficult.
This one is very vague but what I’m trying to say is I need to feel the comfort of people and the way I can meet this need is to realise that I am not the problem that I believe I am.
It’s like if I spent hours or days talking to someone and that suddenly stops I feel awful. Obviously I know that people have their own lives and can’t spend all their time talking, I know that very well as I am the same. It’s just when something feels familiar and then it all of a sudden stops, that’s when my brain works overtime in wandering why. This is what I mean about the fact I don’t really crave attention, I am very comfortable in my own skin and company, I just don’t like sudden change when it comes to what’s closest to me.
I managed to deal with this need but slowly coming to terms with the fact that it’s not be that is the issue. It’s lifestyles and other outside factors. Life isn’t easy living with what I feel every day, but in slowly getting there and I’m proud of it.